More What Is Up???

I have to say this First! I want to formally and publicly apologize to ANY and ALL Masters that I have chatted with in the past that I have mislead or or appeared to them as a player slave and wasn't real. As i have said in the first entry......it took along time for me to accept myself for what I am and that it is OK to be a Natural born slave and serve a Master. Which brings me to the first topic I would like to discuss. The issue of being REAL! The first thing you have to do is be real with yourself, whether you are a Master or a slave. Each has it's own set of responsibilities that must be faced head on with yourself in order to be the best Master or slave that you can be. Part of being real with yourself is acceptance and being OK with that acceptance. What I am talking about is self-esteem and self-realization.

As i have said, it took along time to accept and appreciate what i am and loving myself for it. i think this is the problem that is most prevalent on the slave side of the relationship and dynamic. In our "civilized" and "modern" world it is considered wrong to want to be with someone that whips, flogs, collars, makes you beg, is verbally abusive, demanding, and in control of every aspect of your life. And if you are That type of person that wants that in their life or as a way of life, then something must be wrong with YOU! Because of human nature's desire to be accepted and part of the group, many slaves have a hard time internalizing this and and living the life that they want, need, and deserve to be totally true to themselves and happy. A slave with compartmentalize this need they possess as an aspect of strictly sexuality and fantasy because it can be a hard thing to take and realize unless you have the right sell-esteem to begin with. For the gay slave even more so. Not only are they trying to be accepting of being gay, but to add that they are a born slave can make it seem insurmountable. i know that was the way it was with me. A slave in a chat room usually is really real about what they are seeking and what they are, but the conflict occurs when the realization that acting on it makes it TRUE! Sometimes it is the financial situation, family obligations, or being out in the country and not willing to move that makes the reconciliation of the need meshing with the reality a difficult thing to do. A born slave such as myself, definitely hungers,ravenously desires and Needs to serve a Master. It is accepting those desires with the right Master that can be tough. It has taken awhile but I have recently dug deep in myself and accepted that I am a natural born slave. I can now say that with pride at being that. I want to serve a Master proudly as his slave and property.
That being said, it doesn't mean that the same isn't true for a Master. But I will save that for next time. Any questions or comments can be sent to my e-mail at raven15@consolidated.net

What Is Up?!!!

I will tell you what I think about the Master/slave relationship and what it means. Grantede there will those that disagree but this i what i believe.

That being said, the Master/slave dynamic isn't about cock and balls and holes but about the exchange that happens on the inside of the mind and body. A slave, especially those that are true naturally born slaves, have an innate desire and yearning to serve another human being. It fills a part of their soul that can't be filled otherwise, at least in my case. A slave loves giving up control to a Master that he trusts. The way that is served has nothing to do with the satisfaction of serving.He wants to be dominated and controlled and abused because he feels loved by that and safe by that. He wants to give that kind of power to a man he can trust totally. It is the amount of control given and to what extent in their lives that is the variant between different slaves.He also has to be intuitive to the Master as to what makes him happy and what his wants are. This makes the Master/slave as much as a psychological/spiritual relationship as it does a physical one. and for the slave the act of surrendering ALL aspects of his life is also freeing and making the Master and his Master's happiness the total focus of his life.

as far as the Master is concerned, I think a Master takes great satisfaction from being able to dominate and control another human being. A Master get satisfaction not from just dominating but from the exertion of dominance. Let's face it, it would get boring if you had an automaton for a slave never needed discipline and was like a limp dishrag. Different Masters get satisfaction from different levels of force in the domination process. Tying a slave up and fucking him may be enough domination to satisfy one Master but another may want to paddle and make a slave cry and beg before he is satisfied with his domination and control of a slave. And to, that may be the only area of a slaves life that he wants to deal with, the sexual side. others want total control down to what a slave will wear, his employment, and how he will act 24 hrs a day.

with those beliefs of mine as a background, the trick is matching the right Master with the right slave. This can be difficult and brings me to the What's Up portion of today's blog.

i have noticed allot of Masters want x,y,and z from a slave and say they want it for a lifetime. Then there are the Masters that just want x,y,and z for a "session". What is frustrating for me is that in both cases they think they will get it from a twink (18-30yo). Then there are the twink slaves that are looking for a sugar daddy to take care of them and say they want to be a slave as a way to get what they want. The problem is that to many Masters and slaves think that it is only a physical attraction dynamic that makes a Master/slave relationship work. While physical appearance does have some play in it , That is why I am working out and losing weight and getting back into body building shape, it isn't or shouldn't be the only glue that keeps relationship together.I think that many Masters miss out on taking on a slave that is closer to their age than one with a vast difference. Say for example a 50yo who wants a 20yo for a slave. then that relationship would have to primarily be about the sugar daddy kind. The slave is tolerating any abuse or anything that is done to him not because he truly wants the Master to be happy and not because he loves serving a Master but because he wants his bills paid and a place to sleep that he doesn't have to pay for. By the same token there are some twink Masters that are passed over because they aren't "man" enough to take care of the slave is the reasoning and that they can't satisfy the slave. when it really boils down to the fact that a twink Master hasn't had enough time to have the wealth and level of financial security that a twink slave wants..It is said that a Master/slave relationship doesn't last very long. I think that is true when the relationship is based on strictly the physical and the spiritual doesn't have a place in it. and then there is the gap of knowledge and experiences that are lacking in common when one is allot older than the other. And then there is the plain old thing of life. An older Master may pass on in a short time with a younger slave( meaning allot younger) leaving the younger to go about the sugardaddy/Master hunt again. When a Master and a slave are close in age, then they can relate to each other outside of the bedroom and the act of serving will be more on the same plane for each thus, fulfilling the spiritual/psychological needs of both. A Master and slave both in their forties or forties and fifties may be better able to satisfy each others needs as a whole person rather than being just a good fuck. And the same goes for all Master /slave relationships, that they would be more fulfilling if each party was closer in age and mind set.

Then you get into who is real and who isn't. Which begs to question who is serious and who isn't. Becoming a Master/owner is a very serious thing. Just as, becoming a slave/property is a very serious thing. therefore, if meeting in an online situation it should take a month or so of chatting online about different aspects of each others life to really get to know the other person and if a real time meeting would be the next step. The level of commitment and one that is matched is very important. It amazes me the Masters that think one five minute chat the first time you meet and you are to be willing to spend a big bunch of money for gas and drive 2-3 hrs to get where they are or you aren't serious. One doesn't buy a car on the first test drive or the first car they drive but you are supposed to make a life altering decision in that five minute chat. That tells me 1.) that the Master isn't serious and is only looking for a hook up and 2) the are not mature enough to be a Master no matter what their age is. The same can be said for a slave that will just up and run without thinking. They are not real slaves or born slaves they are hedonistic predators.

well I guess i have ranted on enough for now. Drop me a line and tell me what you think. I am always open to hearing form others that I may learn from.

The Search Has Begun

Well I have finally done it. i have started on the search for the kind of Master i want and need in my life. This has been alongtime coming. i have thought about being a slave to a Master for years, but like everyone, i was worried about what people would think. It has certainly cost me. Not in the financial sense but in the sense of being whole and how I live my life. I think i have always known that i was a slave, but didn't want to admit it. i think I was born that way and according to some, that is a rare to find. But being born that way doesn't stop you from denying who you are and what you really want or need. Especially when it goes against all that society says that it does. Being older, and hopefully wiser, I can now say that it doesn't matter what society thinks about the Master/slave relationship because what is important is what the two individuals that are involved in the relationship feel about each other and if it works for them.

With that being said, i am doing what i think i should to find a Master that will be a part of my life for the rest of my life. I have gotten on a website for like minded individuals with the profile name of yourwillbedone. i go to the leather and like chat rooms to see if anyone there is interested in what I have to offer. This is a new beginning for me and it has left me feeling alot better about myself and where I want my life to go. i am open to relocating and willing to staart over again in a new place if that is what is required to be what i know i am and need to be to be whole. if anyone hasany advice about how I should go about my search, please let me know. I will answer all the contacts that I get. I would go to leather bars and other events if i were in a big city, as it stand right now i am not and have some obligations to stay were i am but only for a few more months. I am excited about the prospect of getting to major cities or other areas of the country to see if I can find the Master that i seek